Merry Christmas Emily Perkins
by Monkey Ruler
Summary: It's Christmas! Time for eggnog, fuzzy feelings, and presents. Well, for Emily Perkins, one out of three ain't so bad. A short one-shot based on my other stories. With OCs. So if you haven't read them... Be confused.


**From: "Emily" bluedabadee  
**

**To: "Wanda Allerdyce" , "John Allerdyce" pyroMANIAC **(A/N: please tag on an "at whatever-email-you-want dot com" to all of the names, because fanfiction sucks and doesn't allow me to put any of it without screwing it up)**  
**

**Subject: not dead  
**

hello,

this is emily.

you know, emily perkins. your like.. yeah. mhmm. i haven't talked in awhile, and this lady friend of yours (red or rouge or pogue) called yesterday and told me yall thought i was either dead or hated you. cause i didn't talk to you guys in awhile. or get you anything for christmas. but it's not cause of that.

really

i just don't buy things for people. its a thing i have. a thing that is like.. not an exception for anyone. even you guys. if you were here, i'd give you a handful of chocolate, but you guys had to go to cancun or wherever for your "mission"

the choco would melt by then

here is fun. this orange kid, popsicle, gave me a weird bottle that shoots blue sparks out! like FIREWORKS! janice gave me clunky neon headphones, and i got a bunch of candy and plushies. and candy. and quinn made me a scarf. its white and blue and soft and pretty. i'm wearing it right now

on christmas i'm going to this museum with janice and magenta. they're not really family centric and mark is gonna be gone for the next few months. the art gallery is really cool. the main thingy is this low key sculptor who makes dumpster crap into cool shit. he prolly just like... jumps into a dumpster and comes out with art!

there's going to be a raffle in the park. free muffins for _life. _yeah.

merry x-mas!

bye bye! not dead

i am fine. still not dead

it's fun

bye bye

* * *

"Merry christmas!"

I glared at the happy looking thing smiling at me. Red, white, and blue, with a green and red scarf and a santa hat?

"Do you have atleast some capability of dressing fashionably? Or do you just browse through whatever your mom bought for you at Wal-Mart and say, 'Hey, this doesn't stink so bad. I think I'll wear this today!' Because if so, then I'm going to rob a bank and get you a new wardrobe for Christmas."

He looked away, blushing. Hee hee.

"Emily, stop picking on Will!" Layla frowned, "No one makes fun of you wearing blue all the time."

"Because I make my blue into a statement. A fashionable statement. True, I do the whole browse through the piles of clothes on my floor and pick up whatever doesn't smell bad, but that's because I handpick every single clothing beforehand and ensure everything fits."

Layla blinked.

"Wow. I overlooked the slouching posture and your tendency to punch people whenever they make you angry, but you're really... not feminine in your actions."

Magenta, appearing before them with a black bag, snorted and then took out three purple-wrapped somethings and tossed them at us.

"That's the understatement of a century."

"Hey! I can be feminine!" I pouted. What kind of girl would I be if I didn't even act like one? A bad one. That's what.

"Yeah, and Zach is beneficial to society." Magenta rolled her eyes.

"So, minus the fighting," He laughed awkwardly at his little joke... that wasn't really a joke at all... He laughed awkwardly, "Merry christmas!"

He handed me a bag of chocolate.

Godiva chocolate.

"You're my hero, All-American Boy." I gushed, hugging the chocolate to myself.

"Did somebody call?"

Some old teacher in a dorky red, white and blue getup leaped in front of us, hands on his hips, sparkling brightly and... ugh... I can't even continue with the description. Ew. Old man in shorts.

"What? No." I stopped my nose from wrinkling in disgust.

"All-American Boy is his name, Emily. Sorry about that, Mr. Boy."

"Oh, no problem. But, if you need me, I'm just one call away!" And he rode off into the sunset. Nevermind that we were in a cafeteria, and a few thousand feet in the air...

And I thought this school couldn't get any weirder.

"Well.... That was..." I searched for words in my vast and superior vocabulary to try and describe what just happened.

"He's the sidekick teacher. He was Mr. Stronghold's old sidekick." Magenta explained.

"Oh god... This school wants you all, by graduation, to act like that? _That_ is your goal?" I shook my head in disbelief before digging into my book bag and getting out a handful of chocolate kisses for each of them. I didn't bring any of my actual school stuff. That's for losers. I just filled my bag with a bunch of chocolate left over from halloween.

"Oh, right. Presents." Magenta said, handing Will and Layla little wrapped whatevers, and me one too!

"Aw, it's a plushie! An Eduardo!" I hugged the purple monster plushie and giggled.

"Never mind. You're feminine." Magenta shook her head as more people came to join our group.

"Happy Christmas, Emily!" Janice smiled, Quinn following with an even brighter greeting. His teeth were sparkling.

"Merry Christmas." I dug into my bag and gave them handfuls of chocolate while they gave me two blue boxes. Quinn's was larger, so I opened it first. I squealed and wrapped the large silky scarf around my neck.

"I made it myself." He boasted proudly.

"Aw, thank you wifey." I grinned before taking out Janice's gift and squealing again.

"They were selling them at Zumiez couch tour. I got the lead singer from Scary Kids Scaring Kids to autograph it, too." She grinned evilly at Quinn.

"I love you." I said, staring at her with a serious expression.

"Don't say that around Warren." She joked, "His heart might break."

What?

"What? Don't... What?" I blinked.

"Something left her speechless?" A manly snort came from behind.

"Shut up!" I turned around and glared at Warren. Stupid Janice didn't know a thing. "No chocolate for you!"

"Like I'd want your Halloween leftovers."

How did he know?"

"Your bag is open. There's orange and black candy inside."

I scowled. Then looked at my bag. Then back at him. Then back at the bag again.

"You don't get anything today." I finally said, kicking the bag shut and scowling at him.

"Oh no, I don't get to eat two month old chocolate."

Quinn choked on the handful of chocolate he shoved into his mouth.

"Hey! It's still good! I ate some last night and it tasted fine!" I reassured Quinn, patting him hard on the back.

"Happy fucking holidays." Magenta rolled her eyes, allowing herself a small smirk as she looked on at the craziness this year's freshmen had caused onto their cozy little group.

"Dude, I'll kill you so dead that you, your ancestors, and your future descendants will all blink you of existence!"

Emily was arguing with Warren, as usual.

"Hey, look what I can do! I'm an American flag now, see? I'm all red white and blue! I can be Stronghold's mascot!"

"Ha ha, hey, turn into a tree next!"

Janice and Quinn were being idiots together. As usual.

"Hey, don't make fun of Layla!"

"There's no harm in it, Will. You didn't mind when they were making fun of you."

"But you're special. You know? I mean-"

"Oh, stop already. I'm gagging on the fuzzy feelings exploding out of your ass."

And Emily was stopping all the pukey love moments between Will and Layla.

Thank God.

* * *

"So how do you think she feels around us?"

"I dunno. I'm not the mind reader, Wanda. But I know she doesn't feel awkward with us, at least. She swore there. See? That means she's relaxed."

"How many random adults did you swear around when you were her age, genius? That doesn't mean anything."

"But she's talking to us."

"Because Rogue told her to."

"Or Jean. Jean could be Red."

"Jean's dead."

"That's never stopped her from doing anything, before."

"Grow a brain."

"That's not what you love me for."

"What _do _I love you for..?"

"..."

"..."

"Comedic relief?"

"It'll do."

fin

Happy Holidays! It's not Christmas anymore, but oh well.


End file.
